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I don't want to wait to live!

I don't want to wait to live.

I don't want to wait to dance.

I don't want to wait to date.

I don't want to wait…

So I won't!

I conversed with a friend this week, and she asked me how I was doing. I began to tell her the honest truth of the physical pain I have been enduring daily due to stage 4 spine cancer. 

As I was sharing my true feelings, I began to cry because I realized I had been going through an awful lot these last several months. Enough to make anyone put a halt to living, which I had done without even realizing it.

I had begun to plan my days to do the least amount of things for fear of falling, fracturing my spine, and causing the cancer to spread. I know that sounds absolutely wild as I am typing this blog out. That's what fear does: it limits your mind and life. 

Although battling Stage 4 Breast Cancer, which has metastasized to my spine, has its own set of limitations because my mobility has been affected, that doesn't mean I should live in fear of doing any sort of moving. 

My mental breakthrough came when I decided to go out with my family for lunch and to a few stores. I felt a sense of “Normalcy” returning to me, giving me newfound hope and freedom. 

I've been cooking once a week and making plans to hang out with friends and family.  I do not want to be limited to being in the house, in my bed, for fear of anything. Now, of course, I do know I have to take it easy as I am going through the slow healing process of cancer treatment recovery. 

But again, I will not wait until this process is over to live, dance, laugh, and date. I will do it now because, indeed, tomorrow is not promised.

Love Ya,

Listiner Inspires

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